John Beck Offered To Cowboys?

Well, that's the word on the street.

I'm guessing that Parcells would like to get a 5th rounder for the BYU standout (oy vey).

The issue for the Cowboys is that Beck, despite being better than anything they could grab on day two of the draft, is essentially a career back-up for them. At 27, he's too old to be a replacement project for Romo.

What I don't understand is why a team like Seattle, or San Francisco, wouldn't go look at Beck. Or Philadelphia for that matter. McNabb's fate is up in the air and Kolb was worse than Beck on the playing field. Plus Beck's a Mormon, which is the same brand of imaginary religion that Andy "Go for it" Reid believes in.

Oh well. I'd take a 6th for him.

Sorry, Don'tcallmedolfan. The "John Beck Show" may be over. And yes, I did once refer to him as the "Stormin' Mormon."

Terrible.

Who Is Cameron Wake?

I love this front office. The Super Bowl hasn't even begun to be hyped (probably won't be either) and the Miami Dolphins have already made their first off-season splash. Or possible splash.

Miami GM Jeff Ireland's motto is "Leave no stone unturned." In signing Cameron Wake on a four-year $4.9 million dollar contract with a million guaranteed, he certainly has found something from his proverb.

Why so much for a who? Well, Cameron Wake plays football for the BC Lions in the CFL. In 2007 he won Rookie Of The Year and Defensive Player Of The Year. He successfully defended his Defensive MVP status in 2008.

Cameron Wake has 39 sacks in two seasons. Man amongst boys.

Wake played defensive end in Canada but his explosive quickness and athletic nature led the Dolphins to bring him on board as a outside linebacker.

Need evidence of his explosiveness? Watch this video of Wake grabbing $30 from the ceiling.



That's a 6'3" 240 lbs dude, who if you ask me, could still put on another 10-15 lbs. He has a big frame.

So while he might yet be a nothing in the NFL, we Dolphins fans have again witnessed the omniscience of Jeff Ireland and Bill Parcells. What's even better is the fact that Wake will have an entire off season to train and learn the defense.

Here's a little bio-piece on the CFL's most dominant defensive player. Who is now a Miami Dolphin.

Julius Peppers Watch Officially Begins

Julius Peppers is probably the top defensive player entering "real" free agency. By "real" I mean he isn't Terrell Suggs or Ray Lewis who will both be locked up by Baltimore.

His free agency became very real today when his agent issued a statement that he does not want a long term contract with Carolina. He wants to move on and go to a team where his talents can be fully realized. Peppers apparently wants to play outside linebacker in a 3-4, where his freakishly athletic 6'7" 283 lbs body (he was a standout basketball player in college as well) can be utilized in space.

If this could happen for the Dolphins, they'd be serious contenders. Peppers' ability to defend the pass as well as rush the quarterback is Jason Tayloresque (with a lot less mileage) except that Peppers also has prototypical "Parcells Guy" size.

Joey Porter on one end. Julius Peppers on the other. Can you say Lloyd and Greene. I can.

Please, Bill Parcells, pretty please.... Can we have him?

Free Agency - Phins Potentially Off The Hook

Yeremiah Bell wants to be paid. So I say pay him.

Okay, fine. I'll put a post up about the Dolphins. Jeeze.

Today we're going to talk free agency. Lets start with the fact that the first coach fired (I don't expect more) this off-season was OL coach Mike Maser.

The Dolphins free agents I'd like to talk about are Vernon Carey, Channing Crowder, Yeremiah Bell, and Andre Goodman. Ndukwe is one too. Bye bye, baby.

Vernon Carey

The 2008 offensive line of the Miami Dolphins was certainly inconsistent, with some bright spots and some failures. In the end it was mostly a glimpse of the future.

Jake Long showed that he is in fact the team's left tackle of the future. And a good one at that.

The potential of Donald Thomas was cut short, but his injury should be one that he can come back better than ever (first off-season in a real weight room).

Justin Smiley is somehow going to be off crutches by next monday, which is a very good thing to hear.

Maser was fired nonetheless, and with Sparano's O-line background and the sometimes anemic play it doesn't come as too much a surprise.

Now to Vernon.

Vernon, a former 9th overall selection, has had highs and middles but really no lows during his career. He was quickly shaping up to be a Pro Bowl right tackle his first few years and then was asked to move to left tackle in 2007. He performed efficiently, if not spectacularly at left tackle.

With the drafting of Jake Long this year, Carey was allowed to move back to the right side of the line. His play seemed inconsistent, because of trouble running to the right, but I honestly believe that had more to do with the loss of Donald Thomas and the squalid play of Ndukwe.

Carey is a big tackle who can grade roads. He is the definition of a "Parcells" right tackle. Signing him would allow the Phins to focus on more needy spots on the offensive line in the draft or free agency.

Signing him won't be cheap. We're talking in the 5 year 40-50 million dollar range.

Do I think he gets resigned? I honestly don't know. It comes down to who the Dolphins think they can draft. I think signing him would be a good idea, and that with help on the right side of the line this team could become a elite rushing team.

Verdict: I say sign him and address another position (oh, say outside linebacker) in the draft.

Channing Crowder

Crowder is being difficult. That's essentially the only reason he's unsigned. He wants bigger money (and word is that its a lot more) than what's on the table.

He came in second in tackles this year, after missing the Kansas City game. His absence in the Kansas City game was obvious, as Kansas City ran the ball at will and nearly beat the Dolphins.

The reality here is that Crowder fits the "Parcells" mold perfectly. He has good size, range and plays with a definable nasty streak. There's no real upgrade in the draft (Rey Malauga will be long gone by the time the Phins pick) and free agency isn't much better, as the Ravens' Bart Scott would probably be the first choice and there's no telling what he's like outside that impossibly potent defense.

If the money doesn't get to a better place look to the Dolphins to nab Scott. The Ravens will have to resign Ray Lewis and Terrell Suggs and will not be able to match any offer the Dolphins give to Scott.

Verdict: I say he stays. The Phins will finally get him down some and his country boy self will love staying in South Florida warmth.

Yeremiah Bell

Yeremiah would have gone to the Pro Bowl if he was playing in the NFC. Ed Reed and Troy Polamalu are simply way too much to overcome.

Bell's play seemed to elevate as the season went on, going from good to great. Key stops, big open field tackles (Marshawn Lynch, anyone?) and broken up passes are just some of Bell's late season antics.

Yeremiah was the team's leading tackler, putting up 120. He needs to become more of a interception threat, but really, when you're laying the boom like Bell does you can get away with not getting a pick.

Verdict: A must sign. Bell will take a decent pay raise and stick in Miami. This year's draft, particularly the first two rounds, are chock full of safeties. Some of them with really big potential like Missouri's William Moore. Moore's fast enough to play free safety and more than big enough to step into to Bell's shoes... Yeremiah Bell and William Moore. Starting safeties? God help their foes.

Andre Goodman

There are strong rumors that if the Raiders don't franchise tag Nnamdi Asomugha (quietly the best corner in football - he literally eliminates his receiver from the game) the Dolphins will make a run.

Al Davis is crazy meanwhile, and may franchise a player he'll lose the following year. Asomugha may want to be franchised for one more year in order to hit the market in the 2010 (potentially uncapped) FA market.

Goodman will stay if Asomugha is tagged. That is if the money is right. CB is somewhat deep this year in the first two to three rounds of the draft.

Verdict: For some reason I think Goody stays. No way Al Davis lets his best player go.

When The Season's Over

Well, since the NFC has allowed two gimps into the championship I am officially an AFC die-hard.

Now I'd like to invoke the essence of Deon Sanders. This is what he had to say, in McNabb's presence, after the Eagles defeated (the team they're about to play) the Cardinals 48-20 in late November.

When fans chanted McNabb's name Deon felt the need to interrupt and make a point. Here's how it goes:

"Can I tell them something for you?" he said. "First of all, I would like to tell all these idiotic fans to shut-up. Don't get on his bandwagon now. You're the same guys who booed him on his first incompletion."

"I can't stand them. I really can't. It's not because I was a former Cowboy because I didn't give a darn about any fans. They all hated me because I performed well," Sanders said. "But the way they treated this man from Day One, it's not justifiable. They will not treat any other quarterback in the NFL, like we said, Peyton Manning don't get treated like that. Tom Brady. And I know you [McNabb] can't say it, but I would really like on your behalf, you can take this...God bless you guys. ... "

The Phinisher lives in the Philadelphia area. He has the opportunity to watch the species of fan that inhabits the Philadelphia metropolitan area with a closeness that would make Audubon blush.

This may come as some shock to people outside the area, but Eagles fans are in fact some of the worst in sports. The only die-hards in the area are Flyers fans. Those people are for real. Thick and thin.

Why are Eagles fans turds? Well, for one they had completely written off their team three weeks ago. Racial slurs directed at McNabb were par for the course in any Philly bar. McNabb, who in my opinion is one of the best QBs in the last decade, was being labeled as "unmotivated" and described as a drag on the team.

McNabb was a big problem and the team would never win with him, was a sentiment heard even on the local news. The other more popular sentiment was that either Reid or McNabb needed to go, again preferably McNabb.

Don't get me wrong. I think Reid is good for bone-head decisions and has stubbornly avoided completion of a Super Bowl recipe by signing a big name receiver (since or before T.O.).

BTW: One paper even released the names and addresses of the Eagles ownership in hopes of mischief.

Well, now the ownership, Reid and McNabb are all the best and everyone around here is talking about how loyal they've been. The Eagles are a "Team of Destiny" on the evening news.

People actually refuse to recognize words uttered just three-weeks ago.

It is almost insane. It actually has happened so quickly that it could be psychologically considered schizophrenic. Sincere loathing has overnight been transformed into roiling oaths of loyalty and joy. Not to mention the hyperbolic New Age sentiments of destiny that seem to be peculiarly "Philly."

Ugh... Now, with the chance of a Pittsburgh vs. Philly Super Bowl I will officially be between religious zealots (Steelers fans) and hypocritical bandwagon priestesses (Eagles fans).

I'm going with the Steelers fans. With zealots, you always know where they stand on the matter.

If the Cardinals make it, I won't watch. Pure garbage. I could back the Satanic grandeur of the Ravens defense.

Okay. I'm done complaining.

Tread Lightly Stephen Ross

Above is a picture of Carl Peterson. A man who for twenty years maintained the Kansas City Chief's mediocrity. The night he left town, the bars in Kansas City sold more champagne than on New Year's Eve.

And now the aftermath is upon us. Huizenga is selling (good riddance) and Stephen Ross is making his thumbprint seen (don't screw it up).

On Sunday the above pictured (Chief's fans snicker in the background) Chief's GM Carl Peterson (one of the most limited football minds around and an owner of a vast incomprehensible ego) was seen on the Dolphins sidleline wearing a Miami Dolphins pin.

Peterson and new owner Ross have history, as Peterson ran the operations for Ross' USFL (that's right - another great thing in Peterson's cap) team the Philadelphia Stars.

This unfolds one of three ways, I think.

1) The Good

Ross comes in and has longtime Chief Operating Officer Bryan Weidmeir and his little familiar CEO Joe Bailey goned. He then installs Peterson as the Chief executive of all non-football operations. He comes in and seamlessly takes over running the Miami Dolphins as a business.

Fine with me. I would still prefer Peterson to be kept miles away from my beloved Dolphins but this would tolerable.

2) The Bad

Ross comes in and asks Parcells and Ireland to leave. Parcells would vacate his post by using his clause and receive the money owed to him and go off to a monumental bidding war for his services.

This would be Ross acting in the mold of Wayne Huizenga. This would also be one of Stephen Ross' final decisions made here on Earth. Dolphins fans, can you say torches, pitchforks and hanging? Good. I'm glad.

3) The Ugly

Unfortunately, this one might be the case. Peterson steps in as chief executive of all non-football operations but manages to step on Bill Parcells toes enough to make him exercise his contract loophole or to drive him out next year.

Again, hanging, burning and maybe a slow skinning would be in order here.

Basically, keep your fingers crossed. It's one thing if Bill leaves and we keep Jeff Ireland and Tony Sparano but it is a completely different thing if Peterson becomes involved in football operations.

The guy is just plain old fashioned bad. Terrible, in fact. The Chiefs had 3 playoff wins in his 20 year tenure as the GM.

Stephen Ross, don't screw this up. Make me happy to be rid of the turd known as H. Wayne Huizenga.

3 Keys: Wildcat Wildcard Edition

Let me start by proclaiming that if the Dolphins can beat the Ravens they can beat anyone in the postseason. Anyone.

One thing that I have to observe before this game is that the Dolphins have the emotional edge. The Cam Cameron "did the best with what he had" Harbaugh comments are still out there. The Dolphins lost last time and so these wounds are only deeper. Porter, Holliday, Roth, Crowder and the other members of last year's team are going to have made this locker room material.

I think it will be a nice thing to behold, at the end of the game, as Joey Porter walks up to Cam Cameron (who's eyes go wide with fear) and Joey explains to him that it's okay. That he's just a soft bitch and that's okay because the world needs soft bitches too.

Man. I could really get into talking like Joey Porter. BTW: For those of you with short attention spans, there is are two essential videos to watch at the bottom. Enjoy.

So what will the Dolphins have to do in order to move on to Pittsburgh?

The First Key: Make Plays In Pass Defense

A strange first key, you say, because Baltimore ran it down Miami's throat last time. Stopping the run will be important but not a likely place for generating turnovers. The Phinisher thinks that the key to winning this game will be taking the ball away from the Ravens.

A rookie quarterback is the best way to do this.

In week 7 upstart Joe Flacco had a nearly perfect game. That was also the last time we'd have to look at a poor secondary. Since that game Miami's defensive backs have been playing at an elite level and have been snagging a lot of footballs.

My magic number is 2. Either 2 interceptions or less than 200 yards in the air.

Let's go Goody, Allen, Rinaldo and Y-B. Get some.

Lastly: Porter falls into this category as well. Forced fumble a la Flacco anyone?

The Second Key: "You Can't Have Fun Unless You Stop The Run"

Joey Porter presented that gem to the media a few weeks back. It was a "Cowersim." It is the truth.

I've already discussed this week the fact that the last time the Dolphins met the Ravens they lost NT Jason Ferguson in the first quarter and that backup NT Paul Soliai was suspended that week. This forced Randy Starks, a backup DE, to play the whole game at NT.

I've been saying this since the Dolphins went to a 3-4, but I'll say it again: You can't stop the run without a good nose tackle. It doesn't matter if you have Zach Thomas and John Offerdahl in their prime playing at linebacker. You have to have a nose tackle to control the line of scrimmage. Ferguson is healthy and playing great. Soliai too, has been very solid in his reserve role. He isn't suspended either.

They ain't running it like last time.

The Third Key: Keep Pennington Upright

I know the rumors this week have been about an expanded Wildcat that supposedly will take advantage of certain things the Ravens like to do one defense. Mark my words: The Dolphins will win this game on the back of Chad Pennington.

They have to demonstrate an ability to run the ball. If they can get it going, truly running the ball well, then this all changes and the game opens up. The bottom line is we have a young line (younger than last time they played) and the Ravens have as nasty a front seven as there is.

One key match-up will be Jake Long on Terrell Suggs. Long was yet a rookie last time they met. Now he's a franchise left tackle. Good luck, Terrell.

Finally, Tony Sparano is a hard man. He didn't take his foot off the gas this week. The Phins had a "very tough" practice on New Year's eve and Sparano watched film until 4:30am on Monday after the jets game.

Harbaugh asked his team if they wanted New Years off. Let's give it to'em I say. Lets give them the New Year off.

Here are two videos. The first will bring tears to your eyes. The second will make you bawl like a new born porpoise.

Chad Pennington, our hero.

Miami Dolphins, full circle.

GO PHINS!!!!

One Last Jab At Favre & The jets

Enjoy. This video is pure genius. After this though, it will be all Cam Cameron. All the time.